What a gift I have been given.  As Coordinator of MAAV’s Melrose C.A.R.E.S. Community Mentoring Program, I have a job where I connect with people of all ages and backgrounds. We work with the schools to select the students, and to find the adult mentors they are matched with. I oversee the bonding process, running weekly group meetings until that connection is made. The matches then begin their one-on-one time together, while continuing to meet monthly as a group to reinforce the bonds. Our program model is by far the best thing I have seen out there.

When I started in this role four years ago, I could never have predicted the impact it would have on me.  To see the young teens in the program literally grow up before my eyes has been amazing.  Middle school can be brutal.  There’s bullying and losing friends and just wanting to fit in.  Heck, even as adults we want that.  Giving these kids another peer group that they can lean on is just nothing short of a miracle. 

One of the greatest things I heard from a parent at the recent graduation of our 8^th grade mentoring group was the comment, “the best thing that came out of this program for my child was…another child in the group.  They have become great friends.  My child never had this before the mentoring group.”   The mom also told me that at the recent semi-formal, her child was happy with the way she looked, and excited about being dressed up.  Having her daughter show such positive self-esteem was something new, and her mom was so appreciative.

You never really know the impact a mentor will have on the life of his or her mentee; sometimes the effect doesn’t surface for years. We have seen the articulate book type who joins the football team, or the mediocre student who suddenly makes the Honor Roll in high school. Can I say that these things occurred because of our program? I can’t say for sure, but I do know that we spend a lot of time identifying strengths and building self-esteem. We want each of the students to be themselves and be appreciated for that, and I believe they are.

At the graduation, mentors shared letters of recommendation about their mentees, or letters with wishes for their student’s future.  It was a wonderful experience for all in the room, but especially for the kids to hear, one at a time, how much their mentor appreciated them and had enjoyed sharing their lives with them.

The mentees were asked to do the same.  One of the mentees didn’t do the assignment ahead of time.  I could see a little panic in her eyes.  But I could also see her mind working to come up with something while we were there. All of a sudden she said she was ready.  And then she spoke. It was one of the most eloquent shows of appreciation that I have ever heard. Her words were deep, real, and honest.  By the end of her speech to her mentor, there was not a dry eye in the house.  To hear her say “I love you” to her mentor in front of everyone in the group was unforgettable. How many 13 year olds that you know would do something like that?

Another mentee wrote a poem for her mentor.  This girl was extremely shy when she began the program. Now, when she has something to say, she says it.  She wrote:

My Everything Friend

You magnify my happiness

When I am feeling glad;

You help to heal my injured heart

Whenever I am sad.

You’re such a pleasure in my life;

I hope that you can see

How meaningful your friendship is;

You’re a total joy to me.

Over the past 6 years the mentoring program was funded by a federal grant which ended last fall.  Just last week MAAV was awarded a state grant for $10,000 to support the program; it costs approximately $30,000 each year to operate. The program has helped over 100 kids navigate the difficult middle school years, and these young people have gone on the do great things, with the very first group approaching college-age. We are committed to continuing this worthwhile program, and know that with your support, we can make this happen. 

Sharon Loveridge, B.S., is the Coordinator of the Melrose C.A.R.E.S. Mentoring Program, a program of the Melrose Alliance Against Violence (MAAV). To learn more about becoming a mentor or to make a donation, please contact MAAV at 781-662-2010 or info@maav.org